People think being feared is a bad thing.
However, I respectfully disagree.
Anybody can be feared. But it doesn’t mean they need to use it for bad.
For example, if you’re the most feared person in your neighborhood, it doesn’t mean you beat everybody up.
It just means people won’t start fights with you.
In this article, I will discuss 12 ways how to be feared and respected.
The two are interlinked. If you fear somebody, then you must also respect them.
Think about this…
Would you start hurling threats at Mike Tyson? I highly doubt it.
Even if you don’t like him, you still fear him enough to show respect.
Both are equally powerful emotions.
However, if you only love your friends, it’s difficult to respect them.
There needs to be some kind of fear. And it doesn’t even need to be the ability to fight.
Below you will find other ways to install fear, while still being likable.
The absolute best way to be feared and respected is by learning to fight.
The reason people are not feared and respected is because they are timid. When learning to fight, you can’t be timid anymore.
You have to develop the other side of yourself.
The side you ignore.
The darker side.
As you get more experience fighting, your confidence increases. And people can sense it.
It’s not uncommon for fighters to spot other fighters in a room. Even if they have never met before, it’s just something they feel.
And it has nothing to do with size.
Another thing that should be mentioned…
If you take up a combat sport, you need consistent sparring to get these benefits. Hitting the bag won’t do much.
Yeah – it’s great for conditioning.
But not much else.
So, what are the best combat sports to develop this ‘aura’?
Once you’re more confident in your abilities, start competing to step it up a notch.
Read also: Too cheap for therapy? Read these books!
Getting jacked builds physical presence.
This makes you more feared and respected.
After all, who want’s to mess with somebody who looks strong?
However, it only gets you so far. People will respect you from a distance, but your true personality shows when you start speaking.
Getting jacked alone won’t make you superman.
Maybe on the outside, but not the inside.
Anybody can lift weights and build muscle, but there is no emotional sacrifice.
To be feared and respected, you need to go through emotional turmoil.
That way, you will project an aura of strength.
And that’s what people respect.
If you can put yourself through challenging circumstances and build muscle – that’s the perfect combo.
I recommend combat sports as well as lifting to cover both sides of the spectrum.
Another way to get respect is to achieve the impossible.
“What do people struggle to achieve?”.
Once you know the answer – go out and achieve it!
The most popular way to gather respect is by earning money. But it has to be done the right way.
It’s great getting a job that pays $200k a year. But that doesn’t necessarily gain respect. After all, anybody can turn up every day and get promoted over 15 years.
To gain respect, you need to take the opposite approach by increasing the risk.
Rather than working your way up the corporate world, start your own business.
Starting a business is a big risk.
What happens if you don’t make it work?
How will you eat?
How do the bills get paid?
To take things a step further, you can always go the hard route. Rather than building an online business, choose something that requires human interaction.
This could be through cold calling, door-to-door sales, or in-person pitching.
These things are a recipe for extreme confidence. As a result, you will project yourself differently to the world.
This causes people to fear and respect you.
If you’re interested in developing yourself, you’ve probably heard of Elliot Hulse before.
Throughout the years, I’ve watched many of his videos.
However, this one stood out to me…
He gets a question from a guy that feels stuck in life. He has started drinking and doesn’t know where to go next.
We all know that feeling of being stuck, right!?
And Elliot Hulse’s response was…
“Do something dangerous.”
Sound like terrible advice, huh!?
When we’re stuck in life, doing something scary snaps us out of it.
The reason for this is because it’s impossible to feel stuck while also being scared.
But you don’t need to wait until you’re stuck.
You can do something scary today. The more challenging the event, the more people will respect you.
But you have to commit.
Don’t let fear consume you. Think about what’s on the other side of fear.
Here are some challenging things to do…
- Move to a new city by yourself
- Have an MMA fight
- Compete in a sport
- Climb a mountain
When you meet new people, they are judging you.
It’s human nature.
You need to judge the people in your environment to determine who is a threat.
That’s not just something you can ‘turn of’.
But it’s also a good thing. It provides the opportunity to leave a long-lasting impression.
And the best way to do that is by showing people you should be respected. You can do this by sticking to your word and taking care of yourself.
Even on bad days, try to look your best. The better you look, the more people will respect you.
Here are some tips:
- Chew gum
- Apply cologne
- Comb your hair
- Be the best dressed
And if the situation calls for it, why not put on a tailored suit? That’s one way to garner respect and attention.
Next time you meet new people, you need to remember their names.
You can do this by repeating their name while shaking their hand. Now you’ve said their name out loud, it’s much easier to remember.
Now, every time you speak to somebody you don’t know, use their first name.
Think about it…
Most people use slang words.
For British folks it’s mate.
Americans seem to like the word ‘buddy’.
Either way, none of these words hold that much power because they are widely used.
But using people’s names when talking makes you stand out.
Not only that, but people will assume you’re more confident. And the less you know the person, the more powerful this trick becomes.
The tricky part is remembering people’s names in the first place, right!?
If you look at everybody you know, how many of them are feared and respected.
Not many – I bet.
Around 90% of people don’t garner fear and respect.
And you know what else this 90% of people have in common? Most of them follow the trends!
So, what are the trends?
It could be anything – From fashion to pop culture. People are becoming more and more like clones of each other.
And if you want to be feared and respected, you can’t act, think, dress, and talk like the masses.
You need to stand out.
Look, I’m not saying you can’t enjoy any of the things mentioned above. But do you truly enjoy it or are you just following trends to fit in?
You need to create your own trends and follow your own path.
If you’re interested in something, pursue it, regardless of what others are doing.
Have you ever met an old man that was full of life?
With a young soul and stories that last a lifetime.
Everybody wants to hear his stories and be around him.
That’s a guy who is feared and respected. The reason for this is because he has tons of life experience.
And life experience builds your character.
The more life experience you have, the stronger you become. Why do you find some of the happiest people are old men who fought in wars?
Check out this interview with a WW1 soldier.
Yes, he lived through some bad times.
But how can you not respect a man that’s willing to put his life on the line for a greater cause?
I’m not saying you need to go to war and risk death.
However, there needs to be some degree of risk in your life. Whether it’s financial, emotional, or something else.
Setting boundaries is important because it allows us to protect our time and energy. It also helps us to stay focused on our goals and priorities.
When we set boundaries, we communicate what is important to us, and what we won’t tolerate.
This can be helpful in relationships, work, and other areas of our lives.
There are a few ways to set boundaries in life. The first step is to figure out what is important to you and what you want to protect.
Next, you need to be vocal about your boundaries.
Let your friends, family, and co-workers know what you are and are not comfortable with.
Finally, be willing to stand up for yourself and enforce your boundaries.
If someone crosses a boundary that is important to you, be assertive in communicating that this is not acceptable.
As you become more confident setting boundaries, people will respect you more.
They will be more hesitant about annoying you in case they cross the line.
Speaking loudly also makes you appear more confident and assertive.
There are a few things you can do to speak louder.
First, make sure your voice is projecting and that you’re speaking from your diaphragm.
You can also emphasize your words by speaking more slowly and clearly. Finally, make sure you’re standing up straight and using good posture.
This will help you appear more confident and make your voice sound stronger.
People apologize too much. They apologize for things that they don’t need to, and they do it because they’re afraid of what might happen.
This habit is incredibly damaging because it makes people seem weak and indecisive.
It also damages relationships and causes people to lose respect for others.
There are a few ways to stop apologizing so much.
The first is to start paying attention to when you’re about to say “I’m sorry”.
The second is to ask yourself whether you need to apologize for what you’ve done.
And finally, try to replace the habit of apologizing with the habit of thanking or complimenting others.
Eye contact is an important part of human communication. It is used to convey a variety of emotions, including love, affection, and respect.
When you make eye contact with someone, you are indicating that you are interested in what they have to say.
It can also make the other person feel appreciated and respected.
If you don’t make eye contact, it shows the other person you are timid. While they may still be nice to you, it won’t get anybody’s respect.
So few people are truly respected.
That means the path is difficult, which is why most people don’t take it. If you aim to be feared and respected, you need to put yourself in uncomfortable situations and thrive.
For the fastest results, I’ll leave you with this…
Join an MMA gym and start lifting weights, and the rest will follow.